Chumworth on the News » clapper http://www.chumworth.com Real Headlines, Real Funny Sat, 31 Jul 2010 05:00:00 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 The Week That Was… http://www.chumworth.com/2008/10/04/3315/ http://www.chumworth.com/2008/10/04/3315/#comments Sat, 04 Oct 2008 23:33:48 +0000 chumworth http://www.chumworth.com/?p=3315 I don’t know about you, but for me it was a busy week, comedy writing-wise!

On Tuesday, I posted a new Schwilm cartoon, continuing the mock vice presidential debate that started here.

I’m publishing one new Schwilm comic per week. Tell your friends! If you don’t have any friends, tell your enemies!

On Wednesday (10/1/08), David Letterman told not just one but two of my jokes on the Late Show! Here there are:

Sarah Palin is training for tomorrow night’s vice presidential debate in Arizona.

You know you’re in trouble when your debate goal is to do as well as Dan Quayle.

Download audio file (dave_100108-1.mp3)

Sarah Palin is training for tomorrow night’s vice presidential debate in Arizona.

She says it’s really helped her on foreign policy because in Arizone she can see Mexico.

Download audio file (dave_100108-2.mp3)

You can watch the video of the entire monologue here.

Then came Thursday, featuring the long awaited, not-to-be-duplicated vice presidential debate between Joe Biden and Sarah Palin! During the debate I was Twittering like crazy. Here are some highlights:

08:00 PM October 02, 2008 right about now joe biden is combing his hair plugs.

08:35 PM October 02, 2008 right about now, sarah palin is warming up her flute…

08:46 PM October 02, 2008 here’s the breakdown for tonight’s debate: 1/3 foreign policy, 1/3 economics and 1/3 skeet shooting.

09:04 PM October 02, 2008 i wonder if sarah palin is wearing underwear? hell, i wonder if joe biden is wearing underwear…

09:06 PM October 02, 2008 governor palin, you had me at “you betcha”.

09:22 PM October 02, 2008 i’d like to frisk sarah palin for a weapon.

09:48 PM October 02, 2008 SP said nuculer again. i think we all know that’s a bad sign…

09:58 PM October 02, 2008 palin “we’re building schools for children – no gay children, of course, though, you betcha.”

10:12 PM October 02, 2008 palin “teachers need to be paid more – well, not the gay ones.”

10:22 PM October 02, 2008 wonder if palin could humor us and actually pronounce a “g” at the end of a word. just once. either that or flash some cleavage.

10:30 PM October 02, 2008 palin “i like being able to answers these tough questions without answering these tough questions.”

10:31 PM October 02, 2008 sarah palin is scary as hell – and dreamy!

10:34 PM October 02, 2008 dang, i was hoping biden would pat palin on the ass on the way out.

If you’re on Twitter, be sure to follow me follow here. I’ll be commenting live during the last two presidential debates, so be sure to check it out!

Finally, on Friday, Dave Letterman closed out his monologue by telling another one of my jokes!

John McCain watched the debate and loved Sarah Palin’s performance.

As a matter of fact he applauded so much all of the lights in his house kept going on and off.

Download audio file (dave_100308.mp3)

You can watch the video of the entire monologue here.

Whew!

Oh yeah, let’s not forget that Friday also featured O.J. Simpson getting sent to the hoosegow for a good long time!

Next week will have a hard time matching up…

]]> http://www.chumworth.com/2008/10/04/3315/feed/ 3 The LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN http://www.chumworth.com/2008/10/03/3312/ http://www.chumworth.com/2008/10/03/3312/#comments Fri, 03 Oct 2008 15:51:54 +0000 chumworth http://www.chumworth.com/?p=3312 John McCain watched the debate and loved Sarah Palin’s performance.

As a matter of fact he applauded so much all of the lights in his house kept going on and off.

Download audio file (dave_100308.mp3)

You can also watch the video of the entire monologue here.

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