April 20, 2007.
Presidential Coiffage
Good news: the presidential election is almost upon us! Let’s see, only a little over 18 months until we pick our new leader. In other words – we’re in the home stretch! You know what that also means: time for those wanna be Commander-in-Chiefs to tie up those spilt ends and get that hair presidentially coiffed. Luckily, at least one candidate realizes that your odds of getting elected president are directly proportional to the quality of your haircut. Check it out this joke I wrote that Dave Letterman told on Wednesday’s Late Show (4/18/07):
John Edwards had a $400 Beverly Hills haircut.
That’s a lot of dough. This hairpiece didn’t cost me $400.
Click here to hear it live (format: MP3, size: 247kb) or check it out here or watch the entire monologue here.
My haircuts only cost $15 which I guess is why I’ll never be president.
P.S. Joe Lateshow
-Chum [
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April 18, 2007.
Go Get Him, Al!
If you live in the Northeastern U.S. then, like me, you’ve been drenched for the last couple of days by a rain that won’t quit. If you’re like me you’ve also probably been thinking, “Now that Imus has been fired, why doesn’t Al Sharpton do something about the weather?” An excellent question, my friend, and, for that matter, excellent joke material. To wit (whatever that means) Dave Letterman told the following joke that I wrote about all this on Monday’s Late Show (4/16/07):
It was a stormy day here New York City today.
The weather was so bad that Al Sharpton called for the firing of Al Roker.
Click here to hear it live! (format: MP3, size: 75kb) or check it out here.
Also, the fine technical folks at the Late Show now post video of each night’s monologue. So you can actually see Dave tell this joke (as well as others) by clicking here.
JOE LATESHOW PLUG: Don’t forget to visit my newest comedy writing venture, Joe Lateshow. We aim to publish a new cartoon every weekday (or as close as we can come) so check in every day, or get the cartoons by RSS or email or, hell, put Joe right on your site. Be sure to pass the word because, for the love of god, I’ve got kids to put through college.
-Chum [
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